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Afrocentric Father/Family Bonding (Part 6)

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To cultivate Selfhood Greatness in the child--the greatest feature any one can maintain throughout life--requires attention to 4 main aspects: Validation (Self-Esteem Props), Guiding, Correction, and Sharing. For these--analogized to a Primitive African Lake Dweller's Hut--to have their best and easiest effect requires overflowing nourishment of the child's SHNN (Spiritual Human Nature Needs) and PHNN (Physical Human Nature Needs). This is what allows a child to have Self-Love--an essential for Selfhood Greatness. To know what to do with ones Selfhood Greatness requires settling into an African Tradition type Philosophy of Life and its Spiritual Elements' Base for all ones decisions in 'good fruit' productions. Out of that Base arises the Foundation, called Cherished Values--i.e. Ma'at Principles (Spiritual Elements in action). The visible part situated on the Foundation is the Power Approach to life--i.e. Nonaggression. Here, the father and mother's role can be illustrated by "Interlocking Rings"--the mother and father separately doing what they do and then working together as a team to cultivate a Masterpiece child. They must agree on, preferably using Ancient African Philosophy: A. Approaches--the way a goal is reached. This requires the father and mother having internalized like-kind Values. Nothing matches the parents sharing a Ma'at system of Values in a Peaceful, Calm, and Fun home environment. Otherwise, parents can have individuality in their: B. Methods--how to do the job (e.g. encourage the child to follow his/her own path and with Courage); C. Technique--how tools are used in the approach and method (e.g.by having good manners towards and good behaviors with each other); and D. Manner--the different ways a technique can be handled. The more this Caring and Appreciation process is applied to family members and the more family members are a part of this team, the stronger will be "The Family".

The child's special "Pearl" Genes "locked in a vault" must be released since otherwise they will never display. Each "Pearl" Gene possesses tremendous amounts of stored Cosmic Energy and under great Tension (similar to what is present in a coiled-up spring). Despite that being very difficult to release, each is capable of making a masterpiece contribution to the world. Two things for a father to be successful in releasing this stored potential energy are Bonding and "Pearl" Freeing. Both must be customized to fit the uniqueness of a given child, using varied techniques and manners done with ingenuity in order to get the child to properly respond. It is mainly the father's job to bring the key to unlock that vault. Releasing the child's hidden "Pearl" Genes--maybe one at a time and at the right time--while ensuring their complete expression, as discussed.

Bonding Methods: The "Three Bonding Principles" are: "Love, Modeling, & Time." (1) Show Spiritual Caring by spending time with the child--in recreation (e.g. fishing, playing checkers, or preferably chess); at dad's job; at the child's social life events (e.g. plays the child is in). (2) Show Spiritual Appreciation. Nothing is more delicious for a child than to be complimented in front of others, so as to feel like an Icon; Be glad to see the child at each new meeting; frequent hugs are priceless. (3) Give a nod/sign of "OK" for small achievements. The OK sign is made by the thumb and forefinger touching together in a circle, with the other three fingers splayed out above. This is simply an inverted representation of the "Eye of Horus" which, in a mythological story, was knocked out in a battle with the god Seth--then returned to wholeness by Tehuti. In explaining its meaning to the child, the father says that wherever weakness or faltering might menace the natural order of things, the 'OK' image restores hope through its protective magic and confers that message. The Eye of Horus image indicates everything is 'OK.' Greek fishermen still paint it on the front of their boats as a protective Talisman (a charm which goes on the offense to bring safety) (Ellis, Jesus p300). (4) Treat the boy with Respect and like a man; Treat the girl with Respect and like a lady. (5) Do "JUST FOR ME" things requiring some effort and inconvenience. Mama Clara use to cook a meal "just for me" and that ensured I would never do anything to displease her. (6) Do special things "JUST BECAUSE"--and for no other reason than to say: "I love you." (7) Let the child be the decision maker for everybody on his/her birthday for that builds a sense of power.

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